not_meatbuns | Rebel 21 [Action

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Rebel 21 [Action | Accidental Voice]

[After a couple days of absence, Litchi is back from her short trip home. And, as always with her, it's a bath tub that she's landed in. One Yellow Thirteen's bath tub, to be precise. And she's not in the best shape.

Resounding not only through the apartment, but over the journals, is the sound of the tub cracking as if under a tremendous amount of pressure. Litchi lets out a pained whimper, curling into a ball as best she can despite one arm being tangled in the shower curtain.

The Boundary has cut loose. And Litchi is absolutely terrified.

The journal picks up another quiet groan before she falls silent.]

[[ooc: Backdated to a couple hours before the earthquake! ~~Also, sorry for unannounced disappearance for the update ;;~~]]

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[She gives a weak laugh that sounds almost like a sob, smiling despite herself and taking his hand.]

So it would seem. I... really am sorry about this.

[Way to introduce him to the Tub Club, Litchi. Break the tub with Boundary overload.]

[He helps her to her feet and out of the tub, making sure she can stay steady on her feet.]

Don't be. The tub can be replaced. It's nothing.

[...And then he really notices she's wearing that New Feather sundress.]

...Let me get you some of my clothes.

Thank you, David. I really appreciate this.

[Not that the sundress is terrible, and she really doesn't want to be a bother, but it's most definitely too small for her. Now that she's on her feet, Lao Jiu tiredly crawls down onto her shoulder, curling against her neck. She absently reaches up, brushing past her hair to scratch the panda's ears.]

You did well, Lao Jiu.

Any time, Litchi.

[She'd do the same for him, at any rate. He'll return a few moments later with some of his clothes for her, which included a belt for the pants. He'll hand them over to her and leave the room again so she can change.]

[Once she's gotten changed into the spare clothes, Litchi comes back out into the living room area, hair still down, Lao Jiu still curled up against her neck. When she approaches Thirteen, she's a little fidgety.]

...I suppose I owe you an explanation, huh? I have to admit, I'm not all that sure where to start.

[He pulls out a chair at his table, and motions for her to sit down and take it easy. He'll be taking the seat next to that.]

Start wherever you feel most comfortable. I'm not going anywhere.

[Litchi slowly sinks down into the offered chair, pausing to think of where to start. It's probably best to just work her way backward. Eventually, no matter where she starts, it'll all lead back to the same place, anyhow.]

Well... you've seen the way I fight. The power I use isn't any ordinary magic. It's... well, to put it simply, it's forbidden. The power is incredibly dangerous, more than any one person can handle. The strain it puts on anyone who uses it is... immense.

[Her smile turns almost bitter.]

It's been years since I first got this power and until now, it's never been so out of control. It started a few days after I went home and just... hasn't stopped.

[His expression darkens heavily at this. He can ask the question that comes to his mind.]

...But why would you use a power like that if it's that dangerous?

I... [She trails off for a moment, trying to figure out how to word it. And then shakes her head. The truth, Litchi. Just... tell the truth.]

...I did it to save someone who means the world to me. It was the only way I could think of to become strong enough to save him.

[...His expression and tone softens as quickly as it hardened before. He leans forward and rests his arms on the table, listening to her very closely.]

...What happened to this person?

[Deep breath. It takes her a moment to dredge up the courage to get into this. It's the first time she's told anyone since Kokonoe dragged it out of her two years ago.]

He had been researching the source of this power -- the Boundary -- for some time. Several years, even before I ever met him. It... it ate away at his mind, but... he wanted answers.

[Head ducked, shoulders drooping, she blows out a shaky sigh. This is the part that still hurts the worst.] He disappeared one day. He was always glued to his research, but days went by and he never came in to work.

[Her voice cracks.] By the time I went to see if he was alright... it was too late. And it was all my fault.

[Thirteen listens to her story carefully. The "Boundary..." that was a word Nu had mentioned during the draft. He wondered for a split second if Nu had a connection to it as well.

But that could wait. When he sees Litchi visibly pained to talk about this... he'll scoot his chair to the corner of the table and rest a hand on her upper back.]

Litchi... look at me.

[He'll wait for her to make eye contact with him.]

Whatever happened to your friend, that wasn't your fault. He chose to research that power himself... and like you said, that was before you two even met. You can't blame yourself for the path he took in life.

["It was what I wanted." He had said that, hadn't he? Even though she couldn't quite remember when, she was certain she had heard those words before. But even so...

Tears stinging at her eyes, Litchi shakes her head.]

I should have noticed sooner. I should have been brave enough to try to stop him before it got so out of hand.

[There's that echo again. Nearly identical words, overlapping what she said. She gives a small shiver.]

...But more than anything, I should have been able to find a cure.

[Those tears welling up in her eyes tell tales of how deeply this has been troubling her. Possibly for a very, very long time.]

...Litchi, if I know anything about you, anything at all, I know that you would've done everything you could for him. And I know that you have.

And that's far more than what could be expected out of anyone.

[Despite trying as hard as she can not to break down in front of him, the panic over the Boundary overflow and the sheer toll it's taken on her is rapidly overcoming her effort. She lowers her head, letting her hair fall over her shoulder like a curtain to hide behind.]

I... I promised him I'd stay by his side no matter what, and I mean to keep that promise.

Besides, I've come too far to back out now.

And you've tapped into that power too...

[He pauses there, moving his hand up to her shoulder, brushing her hair aside, slightly.]

Litchi... this isn't easy for me to say.

But you can't let yourself suffer the same fate that happened to your friend. I know... I know you made a promise. But you can't fufill it if that power takes you too.

...And... don't forget, there's many other people who care about you. Don't get so lost in your promise that you forget everything else that's important in life.

[Litchi is silent for a moment, shoulders tense as she keeps trying to fight down tears. It makes sense. Of course it does. But his words are fighting against the major part of her that's been stubbornly clinging to the idea of somehow getting things back to the way they were before.

And what's the point, Litchi? Even if you do get home again, even if you do find him and cure him, if this pattern keeps up you'll just end up right back in Luceti and none of it will have mattered...

After a couple false starts -- and Lao Jiu nuzzling her neck in an additional show of support -- Litchi gives a weak, mirthless laugh and absently wipes a tear away from under her glasses.]

I... I'm sorry, David. It's selfish, I know. B-But I...

[I'm just so scared.]

[He doesn't move his hand, but continues keeping eye contact locked.]

...I don't think what you've done is selfish, Litchi. You're one of the most selfless people I've ever met. Without a doubt in my mind. And I know you want nothing more than to help people. But there's a time when being too selfless becomes self-destructive.

[He hesitates for a moment. This is going to hurt. He knows it will. But he has to say it. He owes her that much honesty. He's not going to sound accusatory, but rather remain as calm and rational and comforting as he can.]

I think using the very power that took your friend away from you in the first place? Even with the best intentions in the world... it doesn't sound like it discriminates. What I saw back there... you were in real pain. Pain I probably can't even begin to understand. And I can only imagine that's not the worst of what might happen either...

[Especially if she's fighting to save someone... he can't even start to imagine what might've happened to him. He takes a deep breath.]

Litchi, I don't want to lose you. You're... a very good friend. But if this is the price you have to pay? It's too much. I would never ask you to stop trying to keep your promise, but you can't keep doing this to yourself either. Please, Litchi... you have to stop using that power before it's too late.

[There really isn't any good way to tell him that it might already be too late. It's progressing faster than she expected and, now that she's here in Luceti and cut off from Kokonoe's help, she's not sure she can actually stop using the power. And as terrified as she is, she definitely wants to stop.

She holds his gaze for a moment, the guilt all but crushing her. Linhua, Tao, Tager, Kokonoe, Bang... and now all her friends here. She's putting them all through exactly what she went through herself. How could I...?

Unable to hold back the tears any longer, she leans in against his shoulder miserably.]

I'll try. I'm so sorry. I... I didn't want to worry anyone and I certainly don't want to hurt anyone either. I'm so sorry for dumping all this on you.

[He gently puts his arms around her to hold her gently.]

I know. It's all right, Litchi. ...It's what we're here for. We all need help at times.

[He's silent for a long moment or two, just holding her close, letting her just... cry as she needs it.]

...You're strong, Litchi. You will get through all of this. But you won't have to go it alone.

[She feels terrible for unloading all of this on him, but it admittedly is a massive relief knowing that somebody understands. Not a word about "give up, Litchi" or "he left you, Litchi"... it's the first time she's spoken to anyone about this and actually felt a little better about it. Not that she's spoken to anyone except Tager or Kokonoe about it.

Despite the fact that she's still hurting in several senses, she wraps an arm around him in a weak hug.]

Th-thank you, David. I... don't think I can ever thank you enough for listening like this.

You'll never have to.

Still, this... really means a lot to me. The only other people I ever told about it weren't terribly understanding.

[Probably because they had the absolute truth behind it, but that's beyond the point. It's still a welcome change.]

I'm sorry this has been bothering you for so long. If this, or anything else, is on your mind in the future... you can always come talk to me.

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